They aren't me.....

According to my memory, I was pretty much a perfect child.  Now, I had my faults (I'm sure), I just don't remember many!  :)  When it came to school, I remember loving it!  I wasn't THE most popular by any stretch, but I was never afraid to go up and try to make a new friend.  I don't remember getting into trouble (very often at least).  I remember having to stand in the hall in 2nd grade because I was trying to motion to a new student (who didn't speak ANY English) that she had to keep her head on her desk, and a teacher from a different classroom saw me and I got in trouble.  But, I was trying to help, right?

My girls aren't me.  They are both precious and I love them more than I can stand....but they aren't me.  I have to remember that sometimes.

Autumn is a LOT like me...chatty, friendly, chatty, a people-pleaser, chatty...:)  But, she is going to get into trouble.  She is, what I like to call, impulsive.  She isn't a bad kid...but she has to miss a recess occasionally, for something impulsive she does.  It makes me crazy.  We try to work on it...but I wasn't that way (at least I don't think I was) so it is hard for me to relate.  I think she should be perfect all the time....Hmmmmm....not going to happen.

Allie is my one who rarely gets in trouble in school (like pretty much never, I hate actually putting that because tomorrow she will probably get into trouble).  But, she is more of a loner.  Not in a bad way.  She told me tonight that she probably won't play with anyone tomorrow because she has played with kids all week and needs a break.  WHAT?  A BREAK from friends...at that age!  OMG!!!  She also said some kids won't ask her to play....broke my heart!  I told her to ask them...she said, "No, I'll wait on them."  WHAT?  I would have walked right up and asked kids to play.

It is hard watching my girls do things differently than I would.  I have to remember, they aren't me.  I love them more than anything and will always be here, supporting them...but they aren't me...and that is okay.  :)

Have a GREAT night!

Happy New (School) Year!!!!

Most people make New Year's Resolutions, usually I do too, but for me it seems to make sense to have resolutions for the upcoming school year.  I am actually kind of excited about the new school year.  I can't wait to hear what they girls think of their teachers and see how they do in school.  I am excited about meeting my new students and being a part of our new school!!  My life will, in some ways, be less stressful this school year and that makes me very happy.  So, here are a few of my New School Year Resolutions...with any luck...I will be successful!!!!

1. Spend more time with my family.  I adore them so much and they make me so happy, so I want more quality time with them.

2. Have more time with just my husband.  We need to make time for just the 2 of us....LOVE my girls, but sometimes it is nice to just go out with him...maybe dinner dates, going to movies (this would make him so happy...NOT RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES though!!), weekend getaways......hmmm...time to start planning!  :)

3. Do more with my friends.  I love being around them!  I love GNO's, cookouts, impromptu gatherings....so much fun!!!


Okay....a few "Healthy Living" goals.

1. Eat healthier...I don't diet, so I will try and eat better.  :)

2. Exercise more....I do pretty well during the week...about 3 times a week at the gym, but I want to try to get in at least 5 days of some type of exercise.

3. Run a couple 5K's.  First one I hope to run....Sept. 10th!!!

A few "Household" goals...

1. Keep the house cleaner.

2. Possibly do some work to the downstairs floors...I've been doing research and getting suggestions!

3. Keep the house cleaner......I am really going to try harder on this one!  :)


I think the 2011-2012 school year is going to be FANTASTIC!!

Have a GREAT rest of the weekend!

At the end.......

The 17 year old girl that I last blogged about, Miryah, died yesterday.  The last few days I witnessed her change for the worse.  She stopped speaking, stopped focusing, stopped using her hands.....she wasn't there......and that was hard to see.  To make matters worse, she lives in a section of town that lost electricity this week.  The high was 114 degrees on the day she lost electricity.  Mark and I took ice, fans that were battery operated, and flashlights.  A nice electrician (actually 2) came over and hooked a generator up for them and got their a/c working.  Prior to that her mom had packed ice around her to keep her cool.  Can you imagine?  Over 100 degrees outside and your packing your child with ice to keep them alive.

I knew yesterday that things were not good....I couldn't stop praying.  Mark, Autumn, and I had planned to go to a movie that afternoon so I had planned to stop by their home afterwards (it would have been around 8).  I don't have any regrets about being with my family at the movies when I got the call.....but I knew it was coming.

Another person and I arrived at Miryah's home shortly after 7:30.  She had passed away around 7.  I was there with her mom when she called the coroner and there when he arrived.  I was there to watch her body be taken, I was there as her mom started discussing memorial arrangements.  It was then I realized how much a part of Miryah's life I was.  I watched her boyfriend cry over her, I watched her grandmother be strong in talking to the many people who came in and out writing reports on her, carrying her body, asking questions, I watched her leave her home.  I did talk to her...told her how proud I was, and how loved she was.

Through the past 6 months so many people have listened to me and prayed for me and Miryah and her family.  I have witnessed people give their time, money, food, resources and prayer to help a family in need.

It was the right time for Miryah to go.  She was not the girl that I met in January.  She had dealt with cancer for over 2 years.  She fought hard.  She would have turned 18 on August 13th.  She told me last week that she would give anything to be back in school.  Then she turned away with tears in her eyes.  She has taught me so much.  It was only 6 months....but I LOVED this child.  I will miss her.

I tried not to write this....

Tonight we went to Larry's Pizza.  They were having "celebrities" wait the tables for tips and all of the tips benefited the American Cancer Society.  It was a GREAT night!  I love those nights where you do something and it turns into more fun than you ever could have imagined...yeah...one of those!

However, there is been something I have felt the need to blog about...but haven't.  I don't know why I haven't....almost afraid to write it maybe...afraid to put it out there, but it is making me crazy so I will just do it.

In January of this year I started working with a 17 year old girl.....she has cancer and had a bad diagnosis.  They didn't expect her to live very long.  At first I actually said no to doing this...I had so much going on...2 kids, school, teaching at the gym, soccer, gymnastics, my husband, PTO president at my girls school, and everything else in my life!  However, I knew I was supposed to do this.  She has made it just about 8 months now, since I started.  But, things are going down hill fast.  I went and saw her last week and lost it when I got home.  She is can't talk, she is just bones, she is not the girl I worked with in January, or March, or June for that matter.  I hurt....I hurt for her, for her mom, and even for myself.  Here is the bad thing...I didn't want to go....Yes, I admitted it.  It is just so hard to see.  However, not going isn't an option...I HAVE to go...I mean literally, it would be harder for me to NOT go.......

I have had some wonderful friends who have given advice and listened to me ramble and I am so grateful for those people who had unexpected texts, phone calls, inboxes...but one thing stood out.  One response really hit home for me....she told me that people are only brave when they are afraid and that people are only strong when they are tired.......I don't know if this makes sense to you like it does to me....I don't consider myself strong or brave...I consider this sweet girl and her mother these things.  However, when I do go and visit her weekly I do ask God to help me be strong and in some ways brave.

If you have a chance...please pray for this sweet girl in her final days or weeks......I know we are at the end.  My prayer is that she doesn't suffer......I will continue to go and be there for her and her mom....I have learned so much about strength and bravery from them.

I actually feel better now...thanks to those of you who read.